The concept of marriage that is proclaimed in our society needs to be corrected and seen based on the values in a marriage that are recommended by Islam. Matrimony or marriage in Islam (Surah Al-Nisa, 4:21) is referred to as a supreme or firm covenant (mitsaqan ghalidza).
This covenant must be based on mutual agreement, and it is enshrined with solemnisation, where the scholars of jurisprudence believe that the marriage contract is ibahah, which means that marriage is a grant of permission and not ownership. The granting of permission is not only owned by one party but must come from both parties.
The rights allowed in this marriage also do not mean ownership of its rights and benefits. The rights and benefits of those rights still belong to the owner and do not automatically pass to the person who has been granted this permission. Thus, the benefits and rights can only be given when permission is requested from the person.
Some scholars of jurisprudence think that nothing can be done to the owner of the body without her/his permission. In fact, it can be seen in the fatwa issued by Dar Al Ifta, Egypt not so long ago banned marital rape.
It is very suspicious and worrying when there are people in our society who try to deny the element of permission or consent after entering the realm of marriage. This patriarchal ideology causes harm to women,
as wives tend to be victims of domestic violence which includes sexual violence, and not to mention that this ideology denies the experience and inflict trauma to wives who experience sexual violence in marriage.
Marriage in Islam does not place one party more entitled or more powerful over the other. A marriage is a cooperation between husband and wife and not something that can be considered as a transaction, contract or barter system.
After reaching a consensus in any discussion or decision, only then it is followed by the granting of permission, including to have sexual intercourse. In (the book) I’anatu Ath-Tholibin, Al ‘Allamah Abu Bakr Uthman Al Bakri says that marriage is the ability to have sexual intercourse, not the absolute ownership of its rights and benefits. Thus, the wife’s body is not the husband’s absolute right in marriage.
