I Had A Fight With My Friend Due To A Serious Disagreement

Being friends doesn’t mean you’ll never argue. Disagreeing can be a sign of a healthy relationship, especially if it’s done respectfully.

It’s important to fight fair and to make up after an argument. In good, productive arguments, both people get to say what’s on their mind without feeling judged, mocked or insulted.

How to fight fair

FIND CONNECTIONS

• Don’t make accusations. Say, “I felt ‘X’ when ‘Y’ happened,” instead of “I can’t believe you did that to me.”
• Never call your friend names or use physical threats or violence.
• Don’t broadcast your argument to other people. That means not writing about it on social media or telling other friends about your fight.
• Stay calm. If you find yourself getting upset, take time out. Agree to talk again once you’ve had time to cool off.
• Don’t bring up old grudges. Discuss the conflict you’re dealing with now, not one that you had six months ago.

Making up

Try not to stay mad for long. Take a step back and think about whether the argument is worth losing the friendship over. If it isn’t, here are some ways to make up:

1. Apologize.
2. Try to explain where you were coming from.
3. Make plans to see each other soon.
4. Do something fun and try to put the argument aside.
5. If there’s more to say, meet somewhere neutral (like a coffee shop) and try to talk about it calmly.
6. Try to forgive and move on.
7. Agree to disagree. Try to move on in the friendship even if you don’t come up with a solution to your argument.